Introduction to Paffycism
by paffydogstar
Like many other unfortunate dogs, Paffy is born with AHT (Absolute Humongous Talent). He grows up with his master Wolfgang in a quiet German town called Kurf.
Paffy loves to sing, but Wolfgang hates it, and to make him stop he hits Paffy with a hammer on his feet and breaks his tail at several points.
By the time his feet are irreparably flattened by the hammer and his tail looks like an open folding ruler, Paffy has developed the death-feigning practice (thanatosis) to avoid further abuse.
One day Wolfgang believes he has killed the dog with his brutal beatings and leaves him behind in the Paffy Falls National Forest, not knowing that Paffy has simply applied thanatosis.
Paffy resurrects and wanders out to the Mediterranean (because the weather is better down there) following his dream to become a Dogstar.
Initially intimidated by the harsh reality of the music business he thinks it wise to start with gigs on a local level – as all musician’s guides prescribe – in order to create a buzz, a fan base and reach the newspapers. The plan is to make some sort of name and head slowly toward the ultimate goal: FAME.
Will he be rewarded for his efforts?
…..to be continued…
Introduzione al Paffycismo
Come tanti cani sfortunati, Paffy nasce con AHT (Absolute Humongous Talent-Talento Assolutamente Megagalattico). Passa la sua infanzia nel tranquillo paesino tedesco Kurf assieme al suo proprietario Wolfgang. Paffy ama cantare, ma Wolfgang ha un limite di sopportazione, e per farlo smettere gli colpisce sui piedi con un martello e gli spezza la coda in vari punti.
Dal momento che i suoi piedi si sono irreparabilmente appiattiti dal martello e la sua coda somiglia ad un metro da falegname aperto, Paffy si rifugia nella pratica del fingersi morto (thanatosis), per evitare ulteriori abusi.
Un giorno Wolfgang crede di aver ucciso il cane con i suoi colpi brutali e lo abbandona nel Parco Nazionale di Paffy Falls, non sapendo che Paffy aveva soltanto applicato thanatosis con successo.
Paffy risuscita e viaggia verso il Mediterraneo (perché fa più caldo laggiù), inseguendo il suo sogno di diventare un Dogstar.
Inizialmente spaventato dalla dura realtà del mondo dello spettacolo lo crede opportuno di cominciare con delle serate a livello locale – come prescrivono le guide per i musicisti – in modo da provocare un brusio, di costruire un fan club, e di richiamare l’attenzione della stampa. Il piano è di farsi un nome, e di seguire con calma il percorso verso la FAMA.
Ci riuscirà?
…segue….
There’s really nothing new here, just more wonderful creations, by a very talented artist!
Thank you, Paul. I’m glad you enjoyed it. And welcome to the Paffycist Community!
The technical question is that the anatomical structure of a mammal’s tail makes it extremely difficult to break. A tail generally consists of a large amount of vertebras that, if force is applied to them by, for example, a hammer, they might be dislocated but not broken.
My Dear Colleague.
Perhaps the term “broken” should be replaced by “snapped”. I may want to remind you though that the tail was not shaped into its current zigzag form by a hammer, but by Wolfgang’s hands. Now my question to you is: Can a hammer flatten feet?
Prof. Von Holberg-Reutengrauscher
The flattening of feet is an old tratition but exclusively applied to human female feet, especially in China. Foot-binding resulted in lifelong disabilities for most of its subjects. When foot-binding was popular and customary, women and their families and husbands took great pride in tiny feet that had achieved the desired lotus shape.
Flattenig dog’s paws seems like a practice from ancient times, when flattened dog’s paws were high fashion at the French court of Louis XV.
Recent studies reveal that dogs underwent severe suffering when paw-flattening was practiced.
I would like to refer to the page “Paffy. The Origins..” As you see, these ancient rock paintings, discovered in Paffystan, show the flattened paws in different species. These paintings date from the late Paffeozoic period, which is somewhere in the near future, shortly before Louis XV’s victorious come-back.